“What Are You Going to do About That?”

I love my mom! She totally “gets” me. I don’t always love that she knows what I’m thinking or what my next move is going to be even before I do, but most of the time it’s nice to not have to explain everything, and she’s very direct.
It was summer time 2006, Zack was not quite 3. My mom and dad are very present in our lives so it wasn’t a surprise to have mom drop by unexpectedly. I was cleaning up from lunch and the kids were getting ready for some downtime, which for Zack meant standing in front of the CD player belting out some Kelly Clarkson’s “Since You’ve Been Gone”. My mom came in and said “Who’s singing?” and I answered “Zack”. She walked down the hallway, peaked into the living room, came back to me and said “What are you going to do about that?”.
That one sentence offered both relief and panic She saw it too! Not only that, but from her statement she knew that it meant he was going to need some guidance, and from her tone she also totally understood my mixed emotions! I just stood there and looked at her feeling all the relief and panic and said, “I have no idea”. Yes something was there, and I knew that if I wanted to have any control over the situation, then I needed to grab the reigns, buckle up, and hold on tight..but where to go?
At his young age there was so little to go on and that was ok. Now I know about singers that dance, and dancers that sing (we’ll talk more about that later) but at not quite 3 that really didn’t matter yet. There weren’t any true musical theater programs in our area for someone so young and I didn’t think he was ready for that anyway. A few weeks later Zack snuck into his older sister’s dance class and fit right in, so we decided that was the way to go. Most places will start kids as young as 3 in a dance class. It exposes them to rhythm and timing, different styles of music, often encourages them to “feel the mood” of the music, and his instructor even encourages the littles to sing along. It was a perfect start for us and it also showed us that he was able to follow directions, not be disruptive, and, best of all, he loved it! How your child progresses will depend not only on talents and physical abilities but also on his/her emotional growth. I think we sometimes go wrong when we are only pushing for improvement in the talents, but don’t pay attention to what they are emotionally ready for. It’s a very tricky balance as a parent, but your child will guide you if you listen to him/her, and a great teacher who knows his/her pupil will also help. It has taken me years to push down my anxieties over the dreams of this boy of ours , stop my tendencies of pushing through obstacles to get where we are going, and learn to breathe deeply and roll with it. Frankly I still have much room for improvement and at 12 Zack still has a lot of growing to do so I’m still rolling 🙂

One thing to keep in mind if you go the dance route is to pick a school with the focus and philosophy you want for your child. Many dance schools are now competitive, which is awesome for kids who want to focus on dance. If your child wants to have the availability to participate in some musical theater productions, then the commitment required by a competitive dance school or team can limit the theater opportunities. Mind you I said “can”. We have had plenty of friends who have been able to manage both and also plenty who have had to choose. As Zack’s focus became more on theater productions we had to stop the recital dance program he was in and turn to private lessons more specific to his theater dreams.

Generally between 6 and 8 years old opportunities become available for kids to start getting involved in local youth musical theater programs. Sometimes you can be lucky to find something when they are younger, particularly if you have a community theater that might be looking to cast younger kids for a production, but that tends to be the exception and not the rule. We are so fortunate to have several programs in our area and they have offered all five of our kids excellent experiences in multiple different projects. This is again where you want to research the program(s) available, and find the one that fits best with what you and your child are looking for. We started in the one closest to home that was a lovely small community theater that performs many classic or “standard” productions. They offered summer camps and year long musical theater classes for all the kids, but the performance opportunities were really only available to the select few who were cast in the productions. This worked for Zack and his brothers, boys in a world of girls, but not for our daughter. We discovered another program, a little further away, where they held auditions for the youth productions, but everyone was cast in a role. At first we were concerned that our kid would get lost in that huge sea of kids, but this group does an excellent job of making each child feel like a big part of the production. Point being , there are so many programs out there, look around and feel them out and find the one that’s the best fit for your child.

As kids get older and are exposed to all the ins and outs of song, dance, and acting, it will become clear where their strengths are and where they need more practice. Your child may be able to do it all very well, but I think every child has one component that they just connect with more easily, and this one would be a strength. Our Zack is definitely a singer who also dances. He just connects better, more naturally, with song. He certainly can dance but if given the choice, he is a singer who dances. Our daughter is a dancer who sings, she has a beautiful singing voice but her comfort lies in dance. Professional auditions are often broken into “voice call” or “dance call”. It’s good for children to figure out which area is a strength as it will allow them to put their best foot forward first, make a great first impression, and build confidence. Generally great singers will be called back to dance, and great dancers will be called back to sing.

It is great to be actively training in both voice and dance, but often finances and schedules can interfere.  I suggest pick the one that needs the most practice to do regularly and maybe slide in workshops or camps for the other when time and money allow.

We found that people in our area wouldn’t offer voice lessons to children until they were ten years old. We didn’t realize how important it was for Zack , who was always singing and playing with his voice, to have training before he was ten. His lack of training led to formation of some very bad vocal habits and much frustration when his voice would “hurt” and he couldn’t make it sound they way he wanted it to. If your child sings all the time, is a true “belter”, and has days of hoarseness because of singing, then find someone reputable who will work with them younger than ten. There is much to be taught at an earlier age to encourage great vocal health.  If we had known then what we know now, things could have been much easier. Skype is a wonderful tool! More on that soon.

I seriously could go on and on about all of this, which is why this is a blog 🙂 But this is where I think you should start with a kiddo expressing interest. The youngest should be in a preschool music class or dance classes, and,when old enough, a good youth musical theater program, and private voice lessons as needed.
There’s so much more in terms of finding auditions, preparing for auditions, finding representation, and even modeling, which is great exposure and practice, but we will save that for another entry. My plan will be to put up a new post each Friday. If you have specific questions ask away! If I can’t answer then I’ll help find the answer for you.